Tuesday, May 1, 2012

’Twas the Night Before?

’Twas a minute before midnight, when all through our house
Only one creature was stirring, and it wasn't a mouse.
The windows were open and the lights were down low
In hopes that sleep would soon come and then go.

The Kitten was all nestled all sung in her bed,
With visions of mice dancing in her little head.
And the man with his iPad and me with mine, too
Had just settled down under our covers of blue.

When out in the yard there arose such a clatter
I sprang from the bed to see what the heck was the matter!
Away to that window I flew like a lark
Threw up that there screen and peered into the dark.

The moon was just quartered and there wasn't any snow
So there was no light on the objects below.
I yelled into the dark for that dog to hush up
He just plain ignored me, that 3-legged pup!

So I stomped down the hallway so lively and quick,
I wondered if that dog had been poked by a stick.
More rapid than gunfire his barks they came
And he barked and he barked as if calling my name.

"Come woman, come woman, come see what I see!
Come right this minute and don't stop to pee!
To the top of the deck! Then down all the steps!
Heed my bark and don't be a schlepp!"

As dead leaves that before the tornado do fly,
When met with an obstacle, I tried not to cry.
Down the hallway I did scamper for I was in a mood
And the more he barked, the more I stewed.

And then in a flash I was at the back deck
I threw open the door and yelled, "What the heck?"
I flipped on the switch to light up a path
If that dog didn't hush he just might feel my wrath.

I peered down the steps and I squinted my eyes
He kept right on barking, well that wasn't a surprise.
Could that be a cat on the outside of the fence?
His bark was so fierce, it didn't make sense.

I stepped even closer, but not into the grass
I stayed on the steps to, well, cover my scared ass.
When lo and behold, what is that I do see?
That dog has cornered an OPOSSUM, oh me!

Nose to nose those two barked and hissed
They were so close that they could've kissed.
He wouldn't give up, no, not that three-legged chunk,
And 'Possum wouldn't either, she was mad as a skunk.

I had to act quickly and with diligent care,
I looked around for something to throw, you know, like a chair.
But nothing was 'round, not one single thing,
So up the stairs like a frog, to the deck I did spring.

I saw what I needed to throw at those two "friends"
To stop that barking and hissing, to make this nightmare end.
I grabbed a toy truck and a big red one, too
Then down the steps like a racecar I flew.

I heaved and I hoed, I threw my best shot.
I missed that old  'Possum, but it wasn't for naught.
I sort of hit the dog, and then I did again,
It was quite a site, but the barking did end.

He ran into the house, fast on his three paws
But 'Possum just stared, she seemed in such awe.
For I had missed her by a long shot with the big red truck
And all I could think was "What the........ heck, I forgot my camera!"








All of the above facts are accurate and actually occurred. As I looked at the opossum, I really thought, how could I forget my camera at a time like this?

P.S. The above cute drawing can be found here.

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